Insomnia, Zoladex & Menopause

Today’s challenge is getting out of bed.

I want to stay under the covers, hide from the world and sleep. I do not want to ‘adult’ today.

Sleep deprived and exhausted. My body feels like a bag of sand and my mind doesn’t feel like my own.

Restful sleep has become a distant memory.

Midnight comes and the wide awake club opens.

As my husband lays beside me all wrapped up, cosy and settled, I fight the surge of resentment. What I would give for 8 hours sleep.

I journal to rid my mind of random thoughts.

Listening to a selection of my previously successful sleep meditations isn’t helping. I have always had an active mind, so sleep meditation has been my saviour for many years. But even this reliable friend has been made redundant.

I know I need to avoid stimulants so I scroll netflix for the most uninteresting viewing, in the hope I will be bored to sleep.

I got more sleep when my daughters were babies

Last night I drifted off at approximately 1:45am. However, my morning celebration wasn’t as you would hope. My husband had, unknowingly to me, closed the bathroom window, my cats entrance to the house after bedtime. So 3:30am I was woken from my incredible sleep. with her scratching at my bedroom window to come in.

The outcome, the wide awake club.

Eventually at 6:45, just as my husband was getting up for work I was beginning to drift back off to sleep. Needless to say I was not in the best moods.

At 9am I woke in a startled state with no idea of the time. I dived up to find my phone, only to slump back under the covers and cry into my pillow.

‘Why is this happening?’ But more importantly, why as women, are we made to feel like this is just part of being a woman? Something we just need to accept and get on with!

For the past two and a half weeks I can honestly say I got more sleep than this when my daughters were babies.

I’m currently averaging 3.5 hours each morning. I say morning, because it isn’t until the early hours that I eventually drop off through sheer exhaustion.

Insomnia & Sleep Deprivation

Sleep deprivation alone impacts so much, here are just a few common example:

• Fogged thinking
• Low energy
• Changes in mood, heightened emotions, irritability, anxiety, stress and low mood
• Forgetfulness
• Low sex drive

It’s important to understand how sleep deprivation impacts your body and mind. Take some time to look more closely at these, the more understanding you have the better. This way you can learn how to be kinder to yourself.

Foggy Brain

It’s easy to become annoyed and frustrated when you can’t remember simple things. For me, even the most basic daily tasks of knowing if I fed my dogs or not is presenting itself regularly.

When your, usually organised, mind has become disrupted with blanks and question marks, it’s easy to slip into a frustrated mindset.

This will only make you feel worse.

Low Energy

Low energy makes even the most basic of daily tasks difficult. When you have insomnia, the exhaustion can really impact your daily living. 

Your ability to do the things you would normally find a breeze, can be significantly reduced. 

Look at where you can reduce the things you ‘need’ to do.

Changes in Mood

This one I will be delving into much deeper. Allow yourself to feel how you feel and resist the urge to suppress or fight it. When you try to suppress how you feel it only builds up inside and magnifies it.

Forgetfulness

Write everything down that you don’t want to forget.

This might mean basic things like making the kids a packed lunch or buying some milk from the shop. It doesn’t matter what!

If you have brain fog and are forgetting things, it’s easy for things to quickly become overwhelming and frustrating. Writing it down will help ease that pressure.

Sex Drive

Sex is usually the last thing on your mind when you feel exhausted.

Speak to your partner and explain. Although this is all happening to you, it will affect your relationship and your partner so take the time to communicate how you feel.

Self Sabotage

Don’t underestimate the potential impact insomnia and sleep deprivation can have on your life. As you can see so many areas of life can be turned upside down. 

It’s easy to fall into self sabotage. When you’re frustrated and tired it’s easy to be hard on yourself. To beat yourself up and have periods of really negative self talk.

To avoid slipping into self sabotage, set aside 10 minutes a day to remove any of your ‘normal’ expectations.

‘Today I am functioning on 4 hours sleep so I know that I won’t be my usual self and that is ok’

Please remember you are not alone. I understand it feels this way at times. But, the more we speak up and share our own experiences, together we can raise awareness and support one another.

As always I’d love to hear your comments below

I have a free community called Miss Warrior, if you feel you’d like to get to know more about me, what I do and how I might be able to help you. 

Together we can make a difference.

With Love